


Poisoning Pigeons in the Park

by high_functioning_sociopath



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies), Tangled (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dialogue-Only, F/M, Fluff, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 03:03:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16589615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/high_functioning_sociopath/pseuds/high_functioning_sociopath
Summary: Flynn thinks he might be falling for the teenager with the grandma phone.





	Poisoning Pigeons in the Park

**Author's Note:**

> My first ever one shot, so this is super exciting for me! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Wednesday 10/28

 

**[3475558989, 5:26pm]**

**< image attached>**

**[3475558989, 5:26pm]**

**Use that one for the website, u can crop it if u need to**

 

[Flynn, 5:35pm]

I think you have the wrong number

 

**[3475558989, 5:39pm]**

**:o sorry!! That’s what i get for trying to save time and type in phone #s instead of just going through my contacts**

 

[Flynn, 5:42pm]

Why wouldn’t you just go through your previous texts with them?

 

**[3475558989, 5:44pm]**

**My phone is old-timey, its not fancy like that**

 

[Flynn, 5:47pm]

Well, that explains why the picture was so pixely. I’d definitely recommend using a smartphone to take a picture for any website

 

**[Wrong Number, 5:48pm]**

**Oh no, really?? Thx for letting me know!**

 

[Flynn, 5:50pm]

Anytime

[Flynn, 5:59pm]

What website is the picture for?

 

**[Wrong Number, 6:04pm]**

**My friend is making me a social media account for my art and he wanted a profile pic for it :)**

 

[Flynn, 6:06pm]

Cool. Good luck

 

**[Wrong Number, 6:07pm]**

**Thank u!!**

 

~

 

Thursday 10/29

 

**[Wrong Number, 2:58pm]**

**It’s done!! I am officially part of the vast network of artists with a social media presence!**

 

~

 

[Flynn, 4:15pm]

Congratulations, welcome to the world wide web, ma’am

 

**[Wrong Number, 4:18pm]**

**Maam?**

**[Wrong Number, 4:19pm]**

**Wait, how old do u think i am?**

 

[Flynn, 4:22pm]

I don’t know...55?

 

**[Wrong Number, 4:23pm]**

**I’m 19!!!**

**[Wrong Number, 4:24pm]**

**What made you think im 55??**

 

[Flynn, 4:28pm]

Well, you text young, but you have an “old-timey” phone and you don’t know how to use social media...i just assumed. My bad. But hey, now I feel better about saying 55. I actually thought you were 60

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:30pm]**

**Okay, i guess ur off the hook. But only cause i laughed!**

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:32pm]**

**My mom was really strict and i only recently moved out, so im not quite hip on all the cool kids’ stuff**

 

[Flynn, 4:38pm]

Hip

[Flynn, 4:38pm]

I must admit, that was quite humorous

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:41pm]**

**Humorous? Whos 60 now?**

 

[Flynn, 4:44pm]

26, but close. I’m quite decrepit, in fact. You should see my cane.

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:48pm]**

**Ooh baby, tell me more**

 

[Flynn, 4:50pm]

I use vapo rub every night

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:52pm]**

**God, yes**

 

[Flynn, 4:54pm]

When I forget to turn on the dehumidifier, I sweat like summer

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 4:55pm]**

**Stop it, i cant take anymore!**

 

[Flynn,4:58pm]

Hahaha

[Flynn, 4:59pm]

I’m Flynn, by the way

 

**[Not An Old Lady, 5:01pm]**

**Rapunzel :)**

 

[Flynn, 5:04pm]

Nice to meet you, Rapunzel

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:06pm]**

**The pleasures all mine**

 

~

 

Monday 11/02

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:48am]**

**< image attached>**

 

[Flynn, 8:50am]

Did you just send me a picture of your breakfast? Are you sure you don’t use social media?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:53am]**

**Its a perfectly made pancake!**

 

[Flynn, 8:55am]

That it is

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:56am]**

**I wanted you to bask in the glory of it**

 

[Flynn, 8:58am]

Oh, I’m basking. I’m basking real good.

[Flynn, 8:59am]

I gotta get to work, enjoy your pancake of perfection

 

**[Rapunzel, 9:03am]**

**Okay, have a great day!**

 

~

 

[Flynn, 12:35pm]

You too

 

~

 

Friday 11/06

 

[Flynn, 5:06pm]

So a customer wanted me to tattoo this on his foot, I thought as an artist you might appreciate it

[Flynn, 5:06pm]

<image attached>

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:08pm]**

**Why his foot? And why does it look like it was drawn by a 5 yr old?**

 

[Flynn, 5:10pm]

7 year old, actually. Apparently his daughter drew it and she asked him to keep it forever, so he decided to get it tattooed. He chose the foot so that no one would have to see it

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:14pm]**

**Hahahaha**

**[Rapunzel, 5:15pm]**

**Thats commitment right there, and she probably wont even understand it**

 

[Flynn, 5:18pm]

I wonder what his wife will say

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:21pm]**

**Ask ur wife and thats probably the answer**

 

[Flynn, 5:23pm]

Can’t, don’t have a wife

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:26pm]**

**Girlfriend?**

 

[Flynn, 5:28pm]

Nope

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:31pm]**

**...boyfriend?**

 

[Flynn, 5:35pm]

Haha no, I’m straight, just single

[Flynn, 5:35pm]

Free as a bird

[Flynn, 5:36pm]

Boooooooooooorn freeeeeeeee~

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:38pm]**

**Ha! Me too, but u couldnt have picked a better song?**

 

[Flynn, 5:41pm]

Gasp! I am offended!

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:44pm]**

**There r a million better songs u couldve picked**

**[Rapunzel, 5:44pm]**

**Im like a bird**

**[Rapunzel, 5:45]**

**Butterfly fly away**

**[Rapunzel, 5:45pm]**

**Blackbird**

 

[Flynn, 5:46pm]

Now you’re just listing songs about birds

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:48pm]**

**Free bird**

**[Rapunzel, 5:49pm]**

**Rockin’ robin**

**[Rapunzel, 5:49pm]**

**Poisoning pigeons in the park**

 

[Flynn, 5:51pm]

Good night, Rapunzel

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:53pm]**

**Good night~**

 

~

 

Sunday 11/15

 

**[Rapunzel, 12:33pm]**

**< image attached>**

 

[Flynn, 12:36pm]

What is it with you and sending me pictures of food?

 

**[Rapunzel, 12:38pm]**

**I thought u’d appreciate it. Its the perfectly made pancake of burgers**

 

[Flynn, 12:41pm]

It looks like a regular burger

 

**[Rapunzel, 12:45pm]**

**But it tastes like magic**

 

[Flynn, 12:48pm]

Who’s that in the background?

 

**[Rapunzel, 12:50pm]**

**My roommate merida. Shes pretty great, i think u’d like her**

 

[Flynn, 12:53pm]

Nah, I’m too busy liking someone else

 

**[Rapunzel, 12:55pm]**

**U’ll have to tell me more about that later, hic and i are going ice skating :) ttyl!**

 

[Flynn, 12:59pm]

Enjoy

 

~

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:45pm]**

**So about this crush of yours**

 

[Flynn, 8:49pm]

I don’t recall using that word, I simply said like

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:52pm]**

**Flynn and [insert undisclosed girl here] sitting in a tree~**

 

[Flynn, 8:53pm]

Oh god, we’re back to the songs

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:55pm]**

**Come on, tell me about her!**

 

[Flynn, 8:58pm]

Well, she’s...new in my life, so I don’t know much about her. But she’s really cute

 

**[Rapunzel, 9:00pm]**

**Aww, thats cute :)**

  
[Flynn, 9:03pm]

Yeah, she really is

 

~

 

[Flynn, 9:04pm]

I’ve got it bad, man

 

**[Hiccup, 9:09pm]**

**For the wrong number girl?**

**[Hiccup, 9:10pm]**

**But you don’t even know her**

 

[Flynn, 9:13pm]

I know! But she’s so cute. RIP

 

**[Hiccup, 9:18pm]**

**Do you even know anything else about her?**

 

[Flynn, 9:21pm]

Admittedly, not much…

[Flynn, 9:24pm]

Maybe I should ask her for a picture

[Flynn, 9:25pm]

I bet she’s got short brown hair and piercing green eyes

 

**[Hiccup, 9:28pm]**

**You’re such a creeper, preying on young girls**

 

[Flynn, 9:30pm]

Hey, she’s 19, that’s legal!

[Flynn, 9:31pm]

...okay that did sound kind of creepy

[Flynn, 9:32pm]

But it’s not that bad…it’s not like I like her BECAUSE she’s young. When she first started texting me I thought she was 60!

[Flynn, 9:32pm]

I’m really not helping myself, am I?

 

**[Hiccup, 9:35pm]**

**Not even a little**

**[Hiccup, 9:36pm]**

**Nah, I’m just messing with you. If you like her so much, ask her out**

 

[Flynn, 9:38pm]

I can’t. What if she says no and never texts me again?

 

**[Hiccup, 9:40pm]**

**And what if she likes you too?**

 

[Flynn, 9:43pm]

Fat chance. I’ll think about it

[Flynn, 9:43pm]

RIP

 

~

 

Monday, 11/16

 

[Flynn, 6:46pm]

What do you look like?

 

**[Rapunzel, 6:48pm]**

**Why? Whos asking? If its the feds, tell them ill never give in!**

 

[Flynn, 6:51pm]

…..what.

 

**[Rapunzel, 6:53pm]**

**Just being weird**

**[Rapunzel, 6:53]**

**Ill tell u if we get to make it a game**

 

[Flynn, 6:55pm]

What kind of game?

 

**[Rapunzel, 6:58pm]**

**21 questions! I ask u something, u ask me something, so on and so forth**

 

[Flynn, 7:00pm]

I am familiar with the game, yes

[Flynn, 7:00pm]

Deal

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:02pm]**

**Im 5’3, with long blonde hair and green eyes**

 

[Flynn, 7:05pm]

Called it. I’m a sucker for green eyes. Any chance I could get a picture?

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:07pm]**

**Hey, one question at a time! Whats ur favorite food?**

 

[Flynn, 7:08pm]

Seriously, you and food

[Flynn, 7:09pm]

Ravioli

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:11pm]**

**Yummm**

**[Rapunzel, 7:15pm]**

**< image attached>**

 

[Flynn, 7:18pm]

God, you’re beautiful

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:19pm]**

**o/////o why thank u**

**[Rapunzel, 7:20pm]**

**My turn, what do u look like?**

 

[Flynn, 7:23pm]

<image attached>

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:25pm]**

**What r u doing with ur face?**

 

[Flynn, 7:27pm]

It’s my smolder. No girl can resist.

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:30pm]**

**O sorry, i forgot to swoon**

 

[Flynn, 7:32pm]

Ouch!

[Flynn, 7:33pm]

<image attached>

[Flynn, 7:33pm]

Better?

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:36pm]**

**Ooh, u cute**

 

[Flynn, 7:38pm]

Such kind words from someone who was so cruel just a moment ago

[Flynn, 7:40pm]

How long have you been drawing for?

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:45pm]**

**Ive been painting for as long as i can remember...its pretty much the only thing my mother let me do, so i got pretty good at it. Its kind of a stress relief for me too at this point**

 

[Flynn, 7:47pm]

You mother was really strict?

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:49pm]**

**Yea, crazy strict**

**[Rapunzel, 7:50pm]**

**Do u have any hobbies?**

 

[Flynn, 7:53pm]

I like video games

[Flynn, 7:54pm]

What movie do you think is ridiculously overrated?

 

**[Rapunzel, 7:57pm]**

**I havent seen a lot of movies yet but i was pretty underwhelmed by the lion king**

 

[Flynn, 7:59pm]

What?? That’s it, we can no longer be in contact. It was nice knowing you, but I gotta go *tips fedora*

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:02pm]**

**Hahaha im so sorry to disappoint u**

**[Rapunzel, 8:03pm]**

**Whats ur favorite video game?**

 

[Flynn, 8:06pm]

Assassin’s Creed, definitely. Can’t pick which one, maybe the second?

[Flynn, 8:08pm]

What’s something you should know how to do but don’t?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:10pm]**

**Wow, ur really good at 21 questions**

**[Rapunzel, 8:10pm]**

**I cant drive, i dont even know which pedal does what. What about you?**

 

[Flynn, 8:13pm]

I can’t cook for my life. I have all the pots and pans, but I always either get takeout or make a sandwich

[Flynn, 8:14pm]

What would immediately disqualify a potential boyfriend for you?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:17pm]**

**Being anything like my mother lol**

 

[Flynn, 8:19pm]

You guys don’t get along?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:22pm]**

**She was...difficult. I moved out as soon as i had saved enough money to**

**[Rapunzel, 8:23pm]**

**If u could have any superpower, what would it be?**

 

[Flynn, 8:25pm]

The power to have exactly enough money for anything I want. If I need $5 for a gyro, there’s $5 in my pocket. If I wanna buy a laptop, $800 appears.

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:28pm]**

**Thats actually pretty smart**

 

[Flynn, 8:31pm]

Why, thank you.

[Flynn, 8:32pm]

Have you been bowling recently?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:34pm]**

**Actually no**

 

[Flynn, 8:35pm]

Wanna?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:37pm]**

**...did u just ask me on a date?**

 

[Flynn, 8:39pm]

I believe I did. What do you say?

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:41pm]**

**Yes :)**

 

~

 

Wednesday 4/12

 

**[Rapunzel, 3:33pm]**

**Wanna come over for spaghetti and meatballs?**

 

[Flynn, 3:35pm]

Always

 

~

 

Sunday 9/02

 

[Flynn, 3:44pm]

Pick up milk on your way home? We’re out

 

**[Rapunzel, 5:46pm]**

**Got it**

 

~

 

Thursday 10/28

 

**[Rapunzel, 8:05am]**

**Happy textiversary**

 

[Flynn, 8:08am]

I love you too

 

~

 

Thursday 10/27

 

[Flynn, 5:47pm]

Do you want chinese for dinner?

 

**[Wife, 5:48pm]**

**I do**


End file.
